A recent post in the blogosphere compared Tigger (always happy) and Eeyore ( always miserable) tendencies, questioning whether we are either one or the other, or both. My question is this – why do we need to choose? Is there some unwritten rule that states the we must choose which we are going to be, and stick to it. No in between’s allowed!
If you want to be happy, be. (L. Tolstoy)
Is it really that simple Mr. Tolstoy? Really? Seriously?
Perhaps it is. Lately I’ve noticed more and more that there seems to be a never ending chase toward happiness (particularly in the blogosphere) – finding happiness – learning to be happy – letting go to be happy. Are we really that wrapped up that we cannot feel happy? Is it really that elusive?
Here is the dealio on my theory of happiness, as it stands at this point in my life. In order to BE happy we must allow ourselves to feel our Eeyore moments to whatever extent we need to feel them – so that we can then appreciate those happy, maybe even bouncy [and don’ t forget flouncy!] Tigger moments even more. Part of ‘finding our happiness’ is the process of learning how to deal with our Eeyore-ness, move through it (at whatever pace we need to move), to reach the other side (which you will) and realize that our friend Tigger was right there all along. We just needed time to visit our friend Eeyore for a bit.
Acceptance is a part of the picture as well. For the most part Eeyore accepts that he is who he is, just as Owl, Christopher Robin, Roo and Kanga, Tigger, Pooh, Piglet and Rabbit seem to. They also accept that their lives are what they are and that it is up to only each one of them as individuals to make changes in their lives – for better or worse. With acceptance comes responsibility.
The glitch in the thinking that throws the whole thing off, is the illusion that things, jobs, money, or a particular person, is the ‘one thing’ that will bring you happiness. If our happiness relies on one external thing, then perhaps it would be more beneficial to look inward and see what is in us which bring us happiness. We have heard this before, yet it still seems to be a trend among some generations.
At the same time it is probably a good idea to consider whether or not we get some kind of reward or recognition for being unhappy, constantly seeking happiness. Sounds a bit odd though, reveling in our Eeyore-ness in an unconscious effort to stir up (the attention of) others in the seven acre wood to come to our aid. Nevertheless, it happens. Wouldn’t it be nice to get together to just enjoy the company of each other without the baggage?
In the hundred acre wood, Pooh and his friends all have their own personalities, perspectives on life, individual fears, challenges and expectations. Are they truly unhappy because they are not Tigger- like all of the time? (or more importantly, is Tigger always that happy?) Or are they just BE-ing with whatever it is they are feeling and BE- ing their authentic selves, allowing themselves to acknowledge the happy, joyful moments and appreciate them more completely. With their whole BE-ing.
Do you try to be happy all the time, 24/7? Do you feel guilty when you are in a Eeyore kind of mood? Or do you allow yourself the freedom to move through and feel both?
Who knew that our adorable childhood friends could inspire us later in life? Winnie the Pooh, Eeyore, and Tigger too-hoo-hoo-hoo!
[Thank you Gretchen Rubin @ The Happiness Project for inspiring this post !]
[Image found on google images.]